Just Silence

I've said it before, but I love my job. I really like being able to help a hurting student see the future possibilities. But as a counselor, the hardest part for me is being silent. It's my job to listen. Many times that's my only job, to simply be there for the student as they tell their truth. And, if you know me, then you know that being silent is not my first line of defense. Even in graduate school, as I was learning to counsel, my professor would stop me and say, "Remember, silence is golden, we find ourselves and our truths in the silence."

That has always stuck with me. I know that I have already written a post about being still and knowing. But being silent is a completely different thing for me. I have learned how important that is from my friends. They have always been there for me, even if it was just to sit in silence, knowing that they were there. Today I was reading my devotion and it really spoke to me. I'm going to copy some of the words from the author Chrystal Evans Hurst below:

Sometimes life delivers news that knocks the wind out of us, and we just don’t have words — for our pain or for the pain of others. And here’s what I’ve learned: Words matter, but sometimes our presence matters more.

When Job experienced great tragedy in his life, he had three friends who came to visit. They came intending to sympathize with him and comfort him. (Job 2:11) But when they realized how bad things were, they mourned with him then sat with him in silence.

“When they lifted up their eyes at a distance and did not recognize him, they raised their voices and wept. And each of them tore his robe and they threw dust over their heads toward the sky. Then they sat down on the ground with him for seven days and seven nights with no one speaking a word to him, for they saw that his pain was very great.” (Job 2:12-13, NASB)

The beautiful thing about Job’s friends is that they were friends of action. They looked out for him and noticed he was hurting. They came to Job without him having to call them to attention. They didn’t start out attempting to fix his problems but chose instead to simply be with him in his despair.

They acted as friends, even though they were speechless. They joined Job in his active grief but didn’t say a word. There was nothing to be said. They understood the value in the companion of silent presence. They were willing to mourn with him, mingle their tears with his and offer quiet comfort.

I can't speak enough good things about my friends. I have been blessed in this life to have been afforded the greatest people to surround myself. They have been like Job's friends, they have sat with me and offered no solutions, just silence. Just knowing that they were there, was all I needed in some of the darkest times. 

I want to model my life like Job's friends first response, to sit silently and know the great pain-to absorb it with them. I want to be a great counselor and help my students in the same way. 

Do you have a friend who just needs your silence and presence? Do you know that God is that great friend for us? He is always there and you can always call out to him. As you go about your weekend, remember that sometimes, silence is the best medicine. Being quiet does not make us weak, it makes us aware of our surroundings. It makes us available to speak when the right words have formed. It's something I admittedly am still working on. But there is hope yet! Shhh, just listen a while.

Here are some of my friends that I love (I did not put everyone I wanted here...sorry, ran out of pics I had available):

Jesus is my Homey

Have you ever noticed that if you change one letter in a word, it completely changes the meaning. There is a huge difference between having a cola and having a coma. I mean we can plan to have a cola! Or even saying, "I love the rain." or "I love the pain". Completely different! And I bet, if you went outside right now and said I love the pain, someone would swoop in and call special services for you!
But in all seriousness, changing a letter can change how you view something. I was reminded of this by my sweet 3 year old. I am the Cherub Choir director at my church. This means that I teach 2-5 year old children a little bible lesson and songs. When I took the job...well volunteer position, I decided that the kids needed to learn the basics. You know, the songs that we learned when we were little. "Jesus Loves Me", "Joy, Joy, Joy", "Jesus Loves the Little Children", etc. While the kids love these songs, you can only sing them 100 times before you start looking for new material. I noticed that before my little cherubs left for Children's Church each Sunday morning, we would sing "Gloria Patri". This is an easy little song and could make the kids feel included. I began teaching it in January. Now remember, these are 2-5 year olds, they can't take too much for too long of a time. But by Spring Break they had it. I would look around during service and notice that they were singing. I was also told by my daughter that "Glory be to the Pather" was her favorite song.

To get to the point, and for those of you who don't know this song, here are the words:

Glory be to the Father
And to the Son
And to the Holy Ghost
As it was in the beginning
Is now and ever shall be
World without end
Amen, Amen

Harper sings the song, but instead of saying Holy Ghost, she says Homey Ghost. I've tried to correct her (even though it sounds so sweet), but she insists that it's Homey Ghost. This got me when I least expected it. You know what...it should be homey ghost! This slang word has been used to mean friend/pal. And when you think about it, Jesus should be our homey!

Do you treat Jesus/God as your friend and companion, or do you think of Him as someone who has the power to help you or not help you. If you think of Him in the later, please let me help you to realize that he is your forever friend. He will still be there with you, even when the world has let you down. He will strengthen you and guide you, if you just listen.

John 15: 13-17 says:
Greater love has no one than this, that someone lay down his life for his friends. You are my friends if you do what I command you. No longer do I call you servants, for the servant does not know what his master is doing; but I have called you friends, for all that I have heard from my Father I have made known to you. You did not choose me, but I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit and that your fruit should abide, so that whatever you ask the Father in my name, he may give it to you. These things I command you, so that you will love one another.

Do you hear this, I chose you and appointed you that you should go and bear fruit.  Jesus chose us! We are his friends and he will help us get what we need. He will make sure that we are taken care of and loved. This gives me so much peace. I know that everything I have ever wanted may have not been in God's plan, but everything I have ever needed, He has provided.

I have amazing friends! I mean the best friends in the whole world. I truly believe that God placed each of them in my life for a reason. And you know what else, that's what friends do. They give you what you need, when you need it. Guess who else does this...GOD! Lay your burdens at his feet and know that he will take care of you! Who else would give up their life, so that you could live? That sounds like an amazing friend and homey!

Here is the video of my sweet girl singing Glory be to the Father!

Basketball Overload

I am so glad it's April! March madness has been going on for it seems like 17 months now, and the TV has been turned into every basketball game ever played by any team ever.  With the exception of the Mississippi State games I despise March madness. My father on the other hand loves a good basketball game.

As he walked into my house the other day, he could not stop talking about the amazing game he had watched the night before. It was a match up between Duke and Kentucky, with Duke winning by 1 point in overtime. It was a buzzer beater!! My dad detailed the game, he was so thrilled to have watched this amazing match up. Funny thing...he had already seen it-in 1992! My husband picked up on the fact that he was detailing a game that happened when we were kids and told dad that it was an old game. Dad couldn't believe it, it was just on TV!

I don't know if you know this, but there is an ESPN classics channel and it anytime in the day you can turn this on and watch a game that was played at some point in the past. These games are chosen because they're really good games with dramatic plays and edge of the seat excitement. This basketball game was ranked as the top game of the century. It had been playing over and over for weeks.

Moral of the story...men never grow out of ball games and they don't pay attention. If I had flipped the channel on and seen a guy wearing shorty shorts playing basketball, I would have known it was an old game. But men, they don't notice these things, obviously. So ladies, when you significant other doesn't notice that you just cut 12 inches off of your hair or that you lost 40 pounds-don't worry, some don't know they are watching a 25 year old basketball game!

Have a great day and remember to laugh! It makes life so much more fun!

Confession Time

Hello, my name is Emily and I am an over-sharrer.

Now that we have that out there, I feel like I can move on. Ha, in all seriousness, I think I have a problem.

If you know me, then you know that I'm pretty much an open book. I wear my heart on my sleeve, I have my feelings written across my face, and if you ask me what I think, I'm going to tell you. I have tried to curb these thoughts and actually think about what I say before I say it, but I admit it, my mouth sometimes explodes!

I overshare. I tell people about dreams I've had, I tell students personal stories to encourage them (even though graduate school told me not to do this), I share what I ate for dinner, I tell too many stories about my family. I JUST DO IT, OK!? But I have to share my latest "problem". I take videos and pictures of my 3 year old doing funny/awkward things and save it for all posterity.

Now I know what you are thinking, "Emily, we all do this." But really, I don't think that you do. I video her in the bathtub, using the bathroom, saying funny things, if she's stuck and can't get out, if she's crying for no reason. I'm terrible!!! I keep these videos so that one day I can show them to her and tell her how funny she was (or I hope still is). I would love to share the videos with you, but I'm hoping that 15 year old Harper will appreciate that I'm only sharing this picture. So if said 15 year-old Harper is reading...Harper, I love you, come out of your room, I won't embarrass you today! Well, any more today, after this picture! 😆

Just remember, this is just one of literal thousands of pictures and videos I have.

I'll just call today #toomuchtuesday